I don't think it is discriminating...but I always thought they should have a Mother and Son dances. I would have loved that with my two boys.

puh-leez...what next? It's a teachinig moment for kids and adults. If there's no father, send a granddad, a friend, a brother. Hope they get the state law changed so the event can go on again. Didn't state lawmakers think about this ?

This is unbelievable, just because a woman doesn't have a husband for what ever the reason may be does not mean a daughter has to be left out of a Father Daughter dance. I know plenty that have gone to a dance with Uncles and Grandfathers.
Cranston should be ashamed of themselves.

Absolutely ridiculous! Things like these dances are something that a child will never forget. It bonds parent/child. I think it's terrible how everything is changing in this world. Connections between people are being disolved and I think it's absolutely stupid. I'm glad my school days are over and so are my children's, but I feel sorry for my grandchildren!

A ban on father-daughter and mother-son dances brought on by a letter from the American Civil Liberties Union. What a disgrace! This country is going down hill fast. We allow this organization to remove things that are good and decent. You can't have anything normal because someone might get offended. Give me a break.....

No and the ACLU is killing our country!

for years our school had Breakfast with dad and kids always brought uncles ,fathers, grandfathers or just friends. Why do we have to always stop the fun things for everyone.

The ACLU crowd won't be happy until they have completely wiped the traditional American family. Or should I say redefine it.

Is the country getting this bad that a mom can't go to a dance with her son and vice versa????? Sickening.

This country better get its head out of its ass soon or every value we learned growing up will be lost to political correctness, which by the way is not how the majority of people feel is the right way. Since when is what a few think is now majority?

Some traditions need to be fought for, and some traditions need to change with the times. I don't remember any father-daughter dance I ever attended so I don't feel strongly about this particular tradition. But if the community is asking for it, then there should be some flexibility. Perhaps some dance (or change "dance" to "social") could be held that is for parent/child as opposed to traditional gender roles. Either parent can take any child and join together as a community for a social with music, dancing if they want, maybe one of those "follow along dance video game" things I've seen at some birthday parties that involve the whole group, cake, punch, and a fun evening that doesn't specifically exclude anyone.

I don't really have an opinon on gender discrimination, but I do know that it's not inclusive. My mother lost her father when she was 9. She has told me that the yearly Father-Daughter Dance in her town was one that she dreaded for weeks leading up and the night of. There are many children that don't have fathers involved in their lives. This reminds me of the Muffins and Moms and Donuts with Dad programs they used to hold at Deerfield. Totally off the mark. Thank Goodness that had been changed!

These dances are a special time for both Father and Daughter. Why take that moment away from them? If people want to do other dances that emphasize other types of relationships, then go ahead and set those up, but you have no right to take away the fun of others!!

some people just have too much time on their hands--this issue is moronic.

I think the ACLU needs better things to do. Why take a special event away like that.

I think when these dance's were originally started, way back, it was a different time and the intent was not discrimination. However, times have changed and in a world where you do have children being raised by dual parents, single parents, 2 moms, 2 dads, it's not really practical and does alienate those who don't fit the category. We should ask ourselves how do the children who don't have a Dad or Mom in their life feel when they can't go to the dance or have to go with extended family member. Kids in school spend a lot of time trying to fit in and these situations don't help. Just my opinion.

Whoever this mother is, she is doing a disservice to her daughter (who undoubtedly does not have a father in the picture, so she's going to ruin a perfectly innocent event.) Our culture is becoming so skewed...less grace and civility on one hand coupled with CRAZY political correctness.on the other. Makes you wonder how the daughter is going to turn out in terms of resilency when Mama fails to let her face any uncomfortable situation. Shame on her.

It's not about gender but that might be the way to get people to pay attention. Why would anyone set up school functions that are going to exclude any student and simply make him/her feel badly? Many children do not have relationships with one of their parents or simply do not have a father or mother. There should be many ways to hold parent-child activities. Would it be so bad to have parent-child ball games instead of mother-son ones? And why are schools perpetuating gender stereotypes in 2012? Can't girls play ball and boys dance? It's time to think about the kids and help them all to feel important and included.

They should just keep the Father and daughter traditional event, and if there isn't a Father in the picture, as so often is the case, then the Mothers should be able to go too and just improvise as the Dad, as they're already fulfilling the role as both parents anyways. That's just my opinion.

Just another case of the minority making the rules for the majority!!!!

Next week's story will be about the bullying this kid will surely experience.

Marlborough offered Mother-Son dances and no one bought tickets. I think it was tried a few times. I asked about it when my son was younger. Plus this is for young girls and the young boys just aren't into this, plus they're more immature than girls at the ages that go to these dances. The girls are into it, like getting a new dress, their hair done and sometimes the dads get them a corsage to make it special. I know my dad has taken my daughters and also taken nieces when my brother passed away so young. If a Mom wanted to take her daughter if no dad or other male was around that was okay, too. Moms would do it but I don't know if the girls would want it. My kids really enjoyed these dances.

Are we actually paying public servants to discuss this issue? What a waste of taxpayer dollars. 30 years ago we would have just had these events and nobody would have said anything. Today everybody has to have their voice heard. What a joke.

first, if this were my child my response to this would be "you'll learn in life that you can't do everything you want..." then remind her of all the things she enjoys doing that other kids can't. Some of these kids (I'm not saying this one, I don't know this women or the situation) need to learn that they can't always have everything. and that because they can't doesn't mean everyone shouldn't be allowed to either. What is this mother going to tell her kid if everyone has cell phones and she can't afford one? Will she try to make a law that teens can't have cellphones? If she can't attend prom because she has other plans that night, should the school reschedule? I know that there are kids out there that are jealous that their friends get to go to the dance with dad, or uncle, or grandfather, but it's a life lesson that they should learn, rather then be taught that if you can't have something, no one should be able to enjoy it.

What if a child has two female parents, or two male parents ? Does that mean both parents are left out if they are both female, or that one of the two male parents would be left out? The definition of 'family' has dramically changed over the years. About 50 percent of traditional parents are divorced leaving a child feeling somewhat at odds when there is an event calling for only one male parent to attend. So should gay parents be left out; children with an absent Dad be left out; a child who may have no extended male family member be left out. Think about it...Father/Daughter dances were started to encourage fathers to take an interest and have more interaction with their daughters...it all started in the days when Dads were the bread winners and Mom had the kids at home all day, or were labeled as 'home-makers' only, and were known charges for the care of 'children'. I think times have changed whereby Dads do spend more time with their children and in some cases are home raising their children. Why not make this a choice parent and child dance and allow the child to choose which parent to bring along. Times have changed and family dynamics have changed along with the times.

I would also add that this is tax funded public education that should accommodate as many as its students to these events as possible. Our world is made up of many different combinations of parents/families these days and rather than hurt a child in this situation I would rather see it become a parent/child dance and allow the available parent to bring the child and not punish those who may have gay/lesbian parents, divorced parents, absent fathers, those children with no extended family outside of the mother, etc. Public education has a duty to accommodate all its children.

It's a father/daughter dance. Get over it.

I don't get this. How can it be "gender discrimination" if one person of each gender is included? Then again, I'm for letting everyone go to everything--fathers and daughters, sons and mothers, sons and fathers, grandmothers and step-children, cousins and neighbors--as long as they're not hurting anyone.

I would say that they should just make it parent/child dances, so that both sexes are included equally: it works under the law and they don't have to change a law that's otherwise likely (I haven't taken a full look at the law itself) quite a good thing.

Whole lotta hatin' going on in this thread. I don't get it. Just call it a dance where you bring a parent/guardian. That's how every piece of communication from schools are addressed these days, anyway. Most will end up coming with their fathers but no one will feel excluded nor offended by the sex of the child's chaperone. The line of reasoning that the child should simply be told that "you can't have everything" is just cruel and unnecessary.

We do not have to change everything so that it applies equally to everyone. This isn't about equality and fairness, it's about ego. It's every liberal that wants to turn everything in this country to shades of gray. It's a father daughter dance. If your father isn't available you bring your uncle or someone who's been a father figure. If your father happens to be female, then that's who your bring. It's not a parent/child dance - do you bring all the kids or just one and leave the other heartbroken ones at home? It's father daughter, says nothing about gender. It's a kids dance. By the way, make sure you thank the people who plan it, put it together and clean up afterwards while you're sitting over your latte trying to make the world a fair place.

If a daughter happens to not have a father or male family member to take, simply teach her that she will not be able to go to and do everything in life. That does not make her a bad person nor does it make the dance a bad dance. Same for boys. Don't spoil it for others. Stop trying to "include" everyone and appease those parents who cannot just raise their kids by saying no once in a while. Really, its no wonder these parents who complain so much are raising kids who complain so much. I do think if there are 2 Moms or 2 Dads that one of them should be able to attend. Please, let's not raise kids who cannot deal with the challenges that life will bring them. We will all suffer the consequences.

Enough with the discrimination card, it's a dance and I doubt if anyone is going to stop anyone at the door. It is a liberal thing, go find something important to be concerned with.

As a former Girl Scout leader between 1986 -1992 in Massachusetts, a highlight each fall was the Father/Daughter square dance. Attendance was optional. If a Girl Scout (yes, just girls) did not have a father or a father could not attend, the girl could go with other friends and their dads. It was fun. Is Father's Day discriminatory? Should women be celebrated on Father's Day or should we ban that day since some of us have lost our dear dads? Really.

Father's Day is not discriminatory because we also celebrate and honor Mother's Day and Grandparents' Day and this is not the Girl Scouts...this is a tax funded 'public school' issue in the topic news.

Marlene, Im not saying dont teach caring and empathy to kids. Just saying this is one of the smaller issues in life. There are plenty of serious situations where you teach those "moral" lessons. However, raising kids who cannot deal with NO is wrong. Tired of the soft parents raising whining kids who end up having to be served by the school psychologist (yes on taxpayers dollars) in order to learn how to deal. So yes, while consideration and caring are important, so is sucking it up and letting others enjoy the things you may not be able to.

A public school dance should recognize all families, all combinations of family and not exclude on the basis of gender, In this particular case, no one is asking the school children 'not' to bring their fathers to the dance, what they are asking is not to call it an 'exclusive' father/daughter dance so that 'all' children not fortunate enough to have a father at home, or for those having two females raising them can have the opportunity to attend. This is not a time for teaching children with no male father some lesson; it is a time to celebrate and reinforce each child as being loved and accepted the same. Teach lessons of "no" when they want that expensive item that you can't afford...that's teaching a reality lesson.

I'm sorry, but every moment of every day is the right time for teaching a child any life lesson. If you don't like my JW example, then here's a school related one. My best friend was severly asmatic, but hated that she couldn't take part in gym with the rest of the kids. should the school cancel gym for her? Not something she can control, not something that makes her happy, but she had to miss out on something she wanted to do because of it. No, because it's obserd to try to please everyone. My kids school does a McTeachers night at McDonalds. Great event, the teachers serve the students food, it's fun for all who attend. Should we cancel it for those who can't? Where does it stop? If we can't have father/daughter dances because some daughters don't have fathers, where do we draw the line with other events? Point is, some kid will always be left out, some kid will always be upset about being left out, and whether its a hard truth or something as simple as having parents who don't like McDonalds, it's lesson to be learned.

Yes, absolutely....what we parents do in our decision-making, our role-modeling, including the caring consideration to show them ways to include more students in a dance will all be teaching moments. This can be one of the most important teaching moments. If you have an open dance for all to come and someone chooses, themselves, not to come, that's their choice just as it is their choice not to attend a McDonald's event...at least they've all been invited without restriction that they can only come if they bring a male father. If a child can not participate in a regular physical eduation class then schools have adaptave physical ed programs to accommodate them so as to help them fulfill the requirements for graduation. So in each case there is either inclusion or an accommodation to include, except for the daughter/father only gender dance. I say make it gender neutral and allow the choice so as to reinforce to all children that everyone is equally important in life. One of the most important lessons you'll ever teach your child.

How about age? Should public school dances recognize all children regardless of age? grade? What about children that attend private schools in the same town, do they get an invitation? What about studends in the same town in the same grade in a different public school, shouldn't they come too? Should all althletes be invited to a basketball banquet? It's a public school, are you really arguing that every event is open to every person regardless of the agenda? Bordering on the ridiculous. Not every moment in life is a teaching moment or intended for every person on the planet. Sometimes it's just a dance and sometimes it's just nice for a Dad to have a fun evening with their daughter.

Wow Marlene, use YOUR common sense...no one is saying a father is waiting for a dance and this dance alone for his one time to bond. You are so far off the point.

Shannon,
providing a gym alternative sends a mesage she is cared about and not overlooked. The child having no father may continue to miss her father, particularly if he died. What if she was abandoned, or if she has two female parents? Not enabling her to go only adds pain to the wound. A simple change from a "daughter/father" only dance to an inclusionary evening event would enable the daughter with two female parents to bring a female-representative father, or the child whose father has died to bring a mother or even an older sister, or a daughter who has never known a father to not feel left out by bringing someone of choice. ...sitting at home when you know your friends are somewhere you could be, through no fault of your own, is an unwarrented punishment; It isn't her fault. The only lesson to a kid where there is an 'exclusive' dance that excludes a group of children that may have no male Dad reverberates that it is a 'me' kind of world where it's okay to punish a young girl if she has no male Dad, through no fault of her own. Trying to eliminate the gender requirement of the "father/daughter" dance and simply calling it a "Dance" says to children that they can attend because it says: "I'm worthy, too".

It seems that there are 2 underlying issues that people seems to reacting to here. First being that this is yet another example of enabling and overcompensating our youth in the sense of fairness and quality for all. There is a part of this argument that I can identify with...I don't believe that every kid on every soccer team needs a trophy. But this is not the case here. We are talking about a family event, which should be just that...no matter what the child's family consists of. Secondly, there seems to be some paranoia about eliminating "father" from the title of the event. Do you really think that girls are no longer going to ask their Dad's to come if it is unspecified who can be their chaperone? For years, the girl scouts have been just calling it a dance, where the child's chaperone has no gender requirements other than to be over 18, and guess what.... about 90% or more still come with their father's. The upside is that all of the girls can come, whether fatherless or not. Secondly, this is not an assault on the "American family." It's 2012 and families today come in all shapes sizes and combinations...this is just a reflection of that fact.

Father-daughter, mother-son relationships are very important. They need special time, place and honor, especially in a society of constantly shifting values and focus. That being said, every child has the right to a relationship that provides the sustaining elements of a father-daughter, mother-son relationship; and these events, while honoring that special bond, need to be for the sake of the bond and not the speciific elements of it, allowing for inclusion of the expansion of these roles in our modern society. How that gets written into law, I have no idea.

How absolutely callous for people on this string to refer to using this as a teaching moment for a girl without a father. My father died when I was 10 years old. He had no siblings and both grandfathers had died. My mothers brothers were off fighting in a war called Vietnam and I had no brothers. Don't tell me that this is a teaching moment where I can't get everything..... The day my father died it was very clear to me...... I don't honestly know how I feel about this issue. There is a certain feeling of nostalgia and history but please understand that children do have feeling too. And shame on the males in this society that do not step up on these occasions to make sure no one is left behind.

This "problem" (which isn't really a problem), is only going to get more attention as more gay and lesbian couples raising children have their kids get to school age. What about the kids with 2 moms and no dad? Or 2 dads and no moms? This isn't the school's problem, they didn't have the kids.....

Just call it a Family Dance and get it over with. While it may seem callous to some people, its also a little unrealistic to teach a kid that everyone should bend to your will and/or life situation.

If you keep coddling these kids, they're going to grow up to camp in parks in Boston, complaining about the inability to pay off their student loan for their degree in Mesopotamian Pottery and Its Role in 21st Century Femininity....

Gays and Lesbians have been around for centuries and already have their kids in school. It's not the fault of the kids, but it is the school's problem to resolve when schools accept public tax payer money. Any institution that accepts public funding can not discriminate against gender, race, etc, etc, etc.

Intrusiveness works both ways, Sir. If you'd rather not have public school policy under state and federal law then send your kids to private religious school that are not subsidized by state or federal monies. We'fe talking about making sure each person has access to activities, not those that are segregated to a select group. If you work for a public agency, funded as such, you work under the rules of law. If you feel it is intrusive to follow law then you'd probably best find an Island for yourself.

I'm glad to see that you are suggesting to rename the dance to "Family Dance"...actually just calling it a "Dance" would probably enable those who choose to go to invite whomever they want to attend. As for letting the mentally or physically disabled join the military, I'd say that we already have millions already in the military who are mentally or physically disabled and many doing a job, maybe not on the field, but certainly doing office jobs as such, or in other suitable position according to the ADA that enables the physcially and mentally disabled to access, either gainful employment, or to work at the level best suited for them. And I'm all for that, too. This is not a "liberal" thing as you have posited here; this is simply how good, caring humans care for one another to ensure everyone gets a fair shot as being included in life.

Knowing all the controversy over this; I'm staying home next time they have the Father'Daughter dance.

The ACLU be damned! They isert themselves in people's lives. The Cranston school officials and their attorney's are gutless wonders. Cranston should have ignored the ACLU. This would force tthe ACLU in making this a national issue. They would receive notoriety once more. They are liberal minded individuals who are also hypocrites. By example, they staged a rally for a certain cause. They also suppled anti-picket signs to protest the cause. Ridculous!

You must be one of those people who have a very limited idea of what is a worthwhile cause, and what is normal--and what you say goes. Is that a good guess? In any case, it doesn't make for progress: a constant increase in the freedom of an ever larger number of people.

This is the stupidest issue. The woman who started this should be ashamed of herself. If her kid doesn't have a father, then another male in her life could have gone with her. Instead, the woman has cry to the world about how unfair the world is to her precious darling and ruins the fun for everyone else. Stupid, stupid, stupid. She's an idiot.

Maybe there should be Mother-Son stuff too. Just saying.

Ravens fans were chanting a cheer the other night that sums this up pretty well.

Just rename the event "Universal dance" so everyone can come.